(upbeat music) >> Mary: Parents are always managing time.

Moments, hours, and years spent with your child are the single greatest influence on their early development.

In this episode of Building Blocks, we'll explore how parents develop language and communication skills with their child in everyday moments.

Welcome to Building Blocks, talking is teaching.

>> Alex: Legacy Foundation is Lake County's Community Foundation.

For over 30 years, we've partnered with donors and nonprofits focusing on youth development, the arts, the environment, health, literacy, and other causes that matter to you.

We're committed to Lake County forever.

First things first, Porter County is dedicated to supporting families, healthy beginnings and quality early learning, ensuring every Porter County baby is born prepared for a strong start in life.

Learn more at firstthingspc.org.

>> I have a very strong connection to other students.

Everyone makes an effort to help each other.

I'll remember the feeling of being here, the feeling that I was a part of a family.

>> Mary: Routine visits with a pediatrician are vital to a child's development.

That's why at North Shore Health Centers, pediatricians provide quality care to every child, every time, ensuring that your child is reaching their developmental milestones and are up to date on their vaccines.

Learn more at northshorehealth.org.

>> Participant: Doing as much as you can, as quickly as you can is important to me.

Life is short, and the earlier we get started helping our community, the better off our community will be.

>> Alex: Additional support for Building Blocks is provided generously by Tom Sourlis and Sue Eleuterio, as well as Porter County Community Foundation serving Porter County since 1996.

Additional support for local programming and Lakeshore Public Media is provided by viewers like you.

Thank you.

(upbeat music) >> Every moment can be activated and turned into a learning opportunity.

You don't have to be in a school to do it.

You don't have to be the library.

It can be on a walk.

It can be while you're waiting in line for the grocery store or while you're waiting for the pediatrician's office.

These are the language rich interactions that really help build a child's brain and promote their development.

>> But it's a firefighter.

>> It's not only just the number of words too, it's the quality of those interactions.

So as you go about your day, going to these everyday moments and spaces.

>> Good job.

>> You go to the grocery store, like, pick out apple.

What color is the apple?

Wait for the response and like, oh yeah, it is red.

You wanna help me put in the basket?

Let's count how many apples we're putting in the basket.

>> Mary: It's never too late and the earlier, the better.

Our consistent themes throughout building blocks and our exploration of early childhood development.

Professionals agree, children are engaging with their world much earlier than many of us may be aware.

>> Certainly at the policy level, we talk about wanting children to come to kindergarten, ready to learn as though kindergarten is where learning begins.

But we know, increasingly that, not only are children learning from day one, but that there are very important forms of learning that are beginning, even before they come into the world.

And in particular that during that third trimester of pregnancy that as hearing becomes active and they are exposed to the rhythms and patterns of their mother's native language that the brain begins organizing around that language.

And that we've got amazing studies that show that young children show a preference even for their mother's native language in the hours immediately after birth that they can recognize it.

You know, maybe not in a vocabulary sense, but certainly the kind of unique patterns of language.

>> It's never too early to read to your child from the day they're born, is wonderful.

But even when they're growing in mommy's tummy, read to them.

>> And even if it's like reading a book, they don't know what the words say, right?

But pointing along saying, oh, look at the pretty red dress and what's gonna be on the next page.

And then you turn, it's like, oh, it's a big wolf, right?

And so these do build the brain and they are the foundation, the building blocks for starting to recognize words later on.

Oh, I've heard this word before.

>> Mary: Parents are a child's first teacher.

A guide for experiences in a new world.

Your baby is born, ready to explore, but needs your direction.

Language is the best tool for navigating these experiences and relationships that await.

>> When a baby is fresh out into the world, right?

Seeing news sight and sounds.

There's a lot going on, and the brain is growing very, very rapidly during this time.

You might be basically speaking into what seems like a void, right?

Of they're not exactly responding or in a way that talking back in full sentences, et cetera.

But there is a lot going on in the brain when you talk or sing with a young child.

>> Mary: Language skills start with and build upon the simplest everyday interactions.

Our babies pick up on subtle and complex aspects of communication earlier than we may think.

>> You need to talk to your child all day long.

You narrate your day.

And it's gonna sound silly because the child is not talking and not giving any indication that they're either listening, or understanding, but I'm like, you still need to put all that language in and let them, tell them what's going on.

And even babies, like I say, start reading to your baby as soon as you bring them home from the hospital.

>> We think about it, learning languages being largely an auditory sort of thing where they're listening to the things that you say, but your baby is also watching very much your mouth and how your mouth and your lips move to even create the sounds that are coming out of your mouth and in the form of words so that you know that eye contact, that observation is very important.

>> Generally, that connection happens first with our eyes.

Before we even can think about sharing a smile or sharing some sort of conversational exchange.

And for our babies, that's gonna be babbling and what we refer to as jargon, which is like, the baby talk where you know your kiddo is telling you something, you have no idea what it is, but you've remain engaged and you're smiling and you gesture right along with them.

Those are foundations, we cannot skip them.

>> Mary: Babbling is the sound of babies' earliest attempts at talking.

It's not failed communication.

It's early communication and it reveals more than you think.

Baby is working on oral motor development, mimicking the sounds of speech and practicing social interactions.

These skills are building blocks of language.

Humans' most advanced tool.

>> In order to talk, you first have to listen.

Our babies, when they're teeny tiny, they are taking in everything, the lights, the sounds, the faces.

And for our babies to engage with us, we have to be listening.

When we aren't distracted, when we can give our babies our full and undivided attention for little periods of time throughout the day, it makes a world of difference.

You listen to them, you say something, they listen to you, they say something back.

And again, the saying isn't, "Hello mom, good morning, I'd like some scrambled eggs," but it's more of just, I've figured out that I have this voice in my body and I'm gonna do something because I saw that somebody got really excited, an adult got really excited when me as baby made a sound, so I'm gonna do it again because I want to keep them engaged with me.

I seek those connections.

And as a baby, those connections are crucial to encourage more engagement, not just with their trusted adults, but with anybody that they come into contact with.

From little baby playtime groups to listening to their teachers as they grow up.

(baby babbling) >> Yeah.

>> Yeah.

>> As they are beginning to coo and babble, repeat some of that back to them.

And you'll be amazed by the engagement that happens between you and your child, and you know, the important neural connections that are being made as you do that.

>> Hexagon.

>> It's a hexagon.

>> Mary: How we engage with children is just as important as what we engage with them.

Playtime is a great time to activate your child's curiosity.

Connecting learning, talking and fun are the building blocks for a child's success in school, friendships and life.

>> Don't be afraid to be silly.

Kids need silly, they like silly and they respond to silly.

We don't care what you're doing.

Sing them a goofy song.

Dance around the kitchen with your baby.

That goes a really long way too, with just them wanting to do what you do.

And that's the imitation, they first have to try.

But they have to be motivated to try.

And that's where the parents' energy comes in.

>> Mary: Communication skills take time to accumulate.

Building upon consistent interactions, simpler skills like eye contact and taking turns will grow into more complex interactions like conversations and expressing needs and emotions.

>> What infants need is that one-on-one eye contact.

They need what we call serve and return interactions where it's sort of a relational back and forth.

Baby makes a sound and mom or dad mirror that back or use conventional language to talk back with their baby.

They pause and they take conversational turns.

They allow their baby an opportunity to process and respond in age appropriate ways.

All of these are the things that help to create the neural pathways in the brain that will undergird our success in school and in life.

>> Get the other one.

>> They call it mother ease, like that when we're talking to a baby or talking to a child, we switch into like this different tone of voice and slow it down and make it all nice and melodical for the kids, and it just something we naturally do.

So that's kind of where they first get started.

And then as they get between six and 12 months, that's when you're gonna start seeing more of like, I'm understanding, you know what you're asking me.

You're telling me to wave by.

You're telling me no, and I'm understanding, you hold your hand out and say, give it to me, and they give it to me.

So then the understanding will start in, and then the expressive language will start to come in between 12 and 18 months.

But you have to build up those foundations first in the first year of life in order for the child to be successful with talking at a year.

>> What do you wanna put in there?

>> Best way to create language opportunities is simply to talk.

That's a beautiful method that helps a baby start to learn about the rhythm of language, how we kind of take turns back and forth.

And we talk a lot about narrating.

When it's diaper changing time, first we gotta pull one tab, pull another, we label everything so that our children can start to make associations with things in their visual field, things in their hands.

Every time Mommy hands me this, she says, diaper, or every time daddy gives me this thing and I put it in my mouth, it's called a bottle.

Those routines are embedded in our day.

Like, oh man, every time mommy opens the door, she says, open.

I'm gonna start anticipating what's coming and jump in.

>> Mary: Parents are a child's first teacher.

Encouragement and modeling go a long way.

Every child is different and progress will come at their own pace, but above all, consistency is key.

>> I know for some parents that's very hard when they're like, I'm trying my best, I'm talking to my kid all day and he still doesn't listen, he still doesn't understand me, he's still not talking.

And so they tend to become more and more quiet, which is not what they need.

The kiddo needs even more input and more input.

And it's so important to read to your child, sing to your child, just language, talking to them all the time.

I mean, I just say you just like narrating a TV show all day, like you're the talk show host, and this is what we're doing today.

Once they do start talking, they have been paying attention and they do understand more than we know just because they weren't speaking, but they tend to pick up language a little bit quicker too.

>> What we really want to see, and what we love to see is back and forth engagement.

And so when we see that child talking with their parent, and even if the child's not talking yet, a baby, right?

Cooing, and then the parent responds to that cooing, that is the engagement that we are striving for.

When you talk, they're listening to the person they love most, right?

And so not only is it building their brain, but it's also building that bond between parent and child.

When you talk, read, sing from the moment they're born, they might not be responding.

It might feel weird, it might be like, I don't know how I feel about doing this at the grocery store, for example.

But it is extremely beneficial.

It takes time, it takes practice, but as soon as you start getting that response back, that coo that like, oh, that's really what makes it all worth it.

And when they start talking back and you then you can have like conversations with your little one that continues to build upon this foundation and really lead to a great start in life.

>> Mary: Along with relationships, experiences strongly influence your child's development.

Keep this in mind when going about your day-to-day chores.

While everyday activities may be dismissed as boring by adults, children see a parent's routine as an exciting opportunity to explore.

>> So we really want to encourage parents and caregivers to bring their children into what they're already doing.

And kids are curious and they love to learn and they love to be involved.

So if you're doing laundry, being like, oh, do you wanna put the clothes into the washing machine?

They love that, it's very exciting to be involved in the adult activities and helping mommy, helping daddy, helping grandma, grandpa, whoever it might be in their family.

And so, when a family is able to bring in their children in these everyday activities, that's again, another learning opportunity, right?

Chores can be annoying, but they can also be opportunities for that learning.

>> Taking young children to the grocery store, for example, is important.

Is sort of the same reason that reading to young children is important.

You know, when you have the opportunity to go with your child to the grocery store and suddenly there's 30 different fruits and vegetables to name, right, you're able to expose your child to a whole new universe of vocabulary.

>> Mary: New experiences and social interactions encourage your child to engage with their environment.

Parents can take small steps to help their child succeed.

Knowing you are there to support them, helps your child feel confident as they venture into the world.

>> We always want our kids to feel good about themselves and we encourage that with experiences.

And many times, kids aren't gonna know what to say without us.

So we prep 'em, we give 'em a little like pep talk.

We on the way to the library in the car, we'll talk about who we're gonna see, what we can do.

You can say things like, hi, or good morning.

You can wave, you can fist bump and if you see another little kid, it's okay to go play with them.

You can set the stage for your child to be successful.

And then when you get to sit back and watch and see them do it, after the fact, circle around and share with them how proud you are of them, what you saw and why you liked it.

I love how you played next to that little boy today, or you did such a nice job giving that baby back her toy when you noticed she dropped it.

Kids love praise.

Everybody wants to know they're doing a good job.

So it's really important that you share with your child what they did well and why you liked it.

>> Mary: Early literacy is another great way to engage your child in language and spark their curiosity.

Sharing a book is an everyday experience that opens a world of possibilities.

>> We talk about the benefit of literacy and its bonding effects and the positive emotion that simply just comes from picking up a book and cuddling your kid.

Families will say, well, they're too young.

It's never too early to start, and there's no wrong way to read.

The idea of books that early again is just, it's about bonding, it's about love.

We want those kids to just even see the object and think, oh, here comes something great because I'm gonna go be with somebody that loves me, that cares for me, and that makes me feel happy.

And when I'm happy, I'm motivated, and when I'm motivated, I'm gonna try to do whatever they're doing.

>> Books expose you to this very rich new universe of vocabulary.

And the same thing is true, going on a nature hike, going to the grocery store, going to the library, all of these day-to-day experiences.

>> Mary: Early literacy, fosters cognitive and language development, improved academic performance, strong communication skills, a lively imagination and a lifelong love of learning.

>> Children who are read to daily, even five to 10 minutes a day, read to, talk to sung, to walk into the doors of kindergarten, hearing roughly 11 million words.

Children who aren't given those opportunities hear about 3 million.

So just with words, we can either set them up to succeed or have them already working to play catch up.

One of the best things that we can give an educator when our kiddos are going through the door is that awareness of the love for reading, the love for literacy with rhyming, singing, dancing, and it's just going to help pave the way.

>> Mary: Language skills, foster self-advocacy, which is critical for children to express their needs, participate actively, and build confidence.

This takes form in simpler ways at an earlier age, and being confident in asking for help sets a trend for self-advocacy later in life.

>> I'm always asking her a question, are you hungry?

Are you happy?

I'm feeding her these questions because I want her to eventually say, yes I am.

Yes I am, I want her to start responding, but I'm giving her all of these things so that when she starts talking about what she enjoys in the world, she has this word bank built of different ways to talk about playing outside, different ways to read a book.

So she's got all of these things and these experiences, she's able to then put into her own storytelling as a kindergartner and put into play when she's writing a story as a third grader, and then find on an SAT question as a high schooler.

So it's building the vocabulary that she's going to use in a multitude of ways.

That starts with us just sharing information, starts with conversation.

>> Mary: Fostering relationships that encourage the sharing of emotions is powerful for the child and parent.

In the early relational health episode, we explored how emotional wellbeing influences positive lifelong experiences and relationships.

>> Kids are told what to do, you will follow my direction, you will do what I'm telling you.

When you can flip that and say, I see that this little person's having a problem, I see that this is, whether you're throwing a fit or not happy, someone's crying.

When I can ask them, how are you feeling?

What do you need, what's wrong, what's happening?

What would make you feel better?

And they can give you that information and then you meet them right where they are.

I just need a hug.

No one's listening to me.

This person called me a name.

I can't find my favorite bear, where's my blankie?

Whatever comes up that is in this person's immediate experience, you can take away the trauma of that and give them a problem solving skill that then builds trust.

>> Parents are dealing with a lot, right?

They're dealing with all kinds of stresses and all kinds of financial burdens and trying to get kids up places on time and wanting the best for children.

There's so much there and it's remembering that it really is those simple moments of connection that make a big difference, right?

>> You know, all these little things that are no big deal to us as humans, as adult humans.

It's a traumatic experience to a child that can't find her favorite blanket.

That's her one comfort thing.

It's a traumatic experience to a high school student that's being called names that is in this confrontation, and they can't get out of that panic fight or flight mode.

So as an adult, when you come in and you soften those things and you just say, "I love you, I'm here to help you.

What can I do to help you?"

They can take that relationship and know that, you know, they're gonna bounce back here that trust has been built.

>> We would be very surprised to learn how impactful those small moments of presence can be.

Where just maybe just that moment where you can set down the phone and really be present with your child, like connect one-on-one, connect over something.

Maybe you're picking them up at the end of the day from childcare and you have that moment where you really just take the time to say, how was your day?

And feel really present can have huge lasting impacts on a child because they feel seen, they feel like, oh, my parent was thinking about me all day.

And all of those like little moments add up over time.

(upbeat music) >> Mary: We hope you leave this episode with some key points.

One, language is a building block that affects all aspects of your child's early development.

Two, everyday moments can have a huge impact.

Encouraging strong language skills can be as easy as narrating as you fold laundry or spending time to read together.

The first 1000 days of early childhood development are crucial and language is a powerful tool for positive relationships and experiences.

Any moment can be a learning moment and an opportunity to bond with your child.

Thank you for watching as we continue to explore "Building Blocks."

(upbeat music) >> Alex: Legacy Foundation is Lake County's Community Foundation.

For over 30 years, we've partnered with donors and nonprofits focusing on youth development, the arts, the environment, health, literacy, and other causes that matter to you.

We're committed to Lake County forever.

First things first, Porter County is dedicated to supporting families, healthy beginnings and quality early learning, ensuring every Porter County baby is born prepared for a strong start in life.

Learn more at firstthingspc.org.

>> I have a very strong connection to other students.

Everyone makes an effort to help each other.

I'll remember the feeling of being here, the feeling that I was a part of a family.

>> Mary: Routine visits with a pediatrician are vital to a child's development.

That's why at North Shore Health Centers, pediatricians provide quality care to every child, every time, ensuring that your child is reaching their developmental milestones and are up to date on their vaccines.

Learn more at northshorehealth.org.

Doing as much as you can, as quickly as you can is important to me.

Life is short and the earlier we get started helping our community, the better off our community will be.

(upbeat music) >> Alex: Additional support for Building Blocks is provided generously by Tom Sourlis and Sue Eleuterio as well as Porter County Community Foundation serving Porter County since 1996.

Additional support for local programming and Lakeshore Public Media is provided by viewers like you.

Thank you.

Dr. Mary Jane Eisenhauer hosts candid conversation with local experts, practitioners, and policy makers bringing focus to ways we can support our youngest citizens.

Find the Building Blocks podcast library at buildingblocksinfo.org.

Practitioners and policy makers, bringing focus to ways individuals in our communities can support our youngest citizens.

Explore the podcast library at buildingblocksinfo.org.

(upbeat music)